letters to josh march 31 2012

you are going to see lindsay buckingham  ??? fuck...what a coincidence...he was over here last night...he played me a melody of his greatest hits while i was in the tub...he sure can drink , i will tell you...(rock stars...is there anything they can't do???)...but seriously...that is fucking fantastic...i am so happy for you...lindsay must be a busy fellow...he has a tour with "the mac" coming up in the summer...complete...(he hopes anyway)...with some brand new songs...what i think they should do is record together live some of his best solo stuff with some of stevie's solo stuff...making it a brand new "mac" album...speaking of such things...john melloncamp is coming to halifax...the bad news...his tour is only going to be in small venues...a.k.a. dartmouth sports plex...you would have an easier time finding world peace than two of those tickets...well , i hope this saturday finds you well...i love you with all my heart and couldn't ask for a better friend...can't wait to hear how the concert turned out...maybe some day you , me and lindsay can get together and i can give you both guitar lessons...(in my humble estimation...he is the greatest guitar player to ever visit this fucked up little planet)...have a wonderful day...luv stu

cat

why buy a cat...when you can stroke your pussy for free???

hiring some kid

so this kid comes into work
for an interview
i ask him
are you ambitious
he says
yes
in fact
i want your job
i laugh
that's ambition i say
no really
i want your fucking job
get out of this fucking office
he continues

so i kick the crap
out of hm

letters to josh march 30 2012

hi josh...so you went to see "ghostbusters"...and then during your drive home...you saw a car from nova scotia with a "ghostbusters" license plate??? that is no fucking coincidence , my friend...to be honest with you...after what i have seen in recent years...i figure it is only 50 / 50 that it was actually human...it is a weird position to be in...at this point...everything i see i question...what ever is going on in this world...it is not what we think it is...i assume that "ghostbusters" ended the same way it ended when i saw it all those years ago...i keep on hearing there is a "ghostbusters 3" in the works...then i keep on hearing that there is not...what the fuck...it wont be as good as the first one anyway...bruce f. and i had this conversation the other day about how the "pink panther" movies kept on getting better... which , of course , is the exact opposite of the way sequels usually go...(the ones after peter sellers died do not count)...well , my dear friend...time to make some bacon and eggs...then go see chantel...have a wonderful day...luv ya heaps...stu 

cure for cancer...

my father invented a cure for cancer...he blew his head off .

rock and roll revisited

on the right hand side of the page...press the rock and roll revisited button...if you like pop music at all...you will love this blog .

March 29

e.t.

the best way to end a relationship is the way e.t. did it...say you will be always with them...then fuck off .

raising someone from the dead

here is what will happen :

1-want to control you
2-despise you for not allowing it
3-hurt you
4-justify it
5-pretend it never happened...or bastardize you

almost all love is a counterfeit :

1-instinct-family
2-control of another
3-fear of being alone
4-co-dependence
5-laziness
6-religious...a series of patterns
7-common goals

"many are called...few are chosen" 
"peril of great price"
live luv

letters to josh january / the post card

do you know what would be really cool??? jackson polloc's painting of a dinosaur...excuse me...my kettle is boiling...just hold on a minute...there we go...sorry about that...anyway...speaking of dinosaurs...let me know when you get the post cards...as suggested earlier...just a tad concerned that post office guy's charity may backfire...as you know...the d.v.d. is skinny as hell so there SHOULD be no problems...put the postcard at "taz" and "art expo" yesterday...got any ideas let me know...modeled last night and there was a boy about 13 or so in the class...couldn't figure it out...then it dawned on me...schools these days have programs where they send their kids to higher learning institutions to see if they enjoy...(at first i thought he was some kind of fucking genius or something...i was right actually...it was the or something)...well , my friend...time to do a little work then a little prayer...mitch is coming over tonight...always a fine time...luv ya heaps...have a great day...stu

letters to josh...january # 1

fuck...there is not much snow there...i thought the place would be plastered with the stuff...( non here)...anyway...that seems really fantastic...i went to a hot spring in whitehorse...not as hot as yours though...i went with a  #@%$  type person...without the...well...you know...attachments...so glad you got to see and experience it...all we really own is our integrity and our story...everything else is borrowed...all most people own is there story...and it ain't much of one...really hoping you get to see the northern lights...have a great day...luv stu

suddenly...from the album / "timmy goes into outer space"...song # 9

suddenly timmy awakens
he sees the dog food in front of him
suddenly timmy awakens
he's back home again
suddenly timmy awakens
he never went anywhere
suddenly timmy awakens
he is back down here

suddenly timmy  awakens
his girlfriend is coming down the stairs
suddenly timmy awakens
she falls and shits her underwear
suddenly timmy awakens
she falls and cracks  her fucking head
suddenly timmy awakens
but he don't know if he is alive or dead

...timmy runs up the stairs...out the door...and to canadian tire...where he quickly builds a space ship...thus beginning his incredible journey .

the conversation

i am having this conversation with this lady...my point was simple...i tell her that people are just like alligators...just with better manners...the only real difference is that we have the capacity to grow spiritually and become fluent in the language of love...she looks at me and says..."people are like alligators , eh??? " she smiles...goes into her front left pocket...and takes out a solid bronze alligator .

christmas...from the book / "d is for wombat...dingo wombat"

for christmas presents
i decided to save money
so i got two hamsters
to screw each other
and gave everyone i knew
one of their puppies
unfortunately
by the time christmas arrived
i had 23,547 of the stupid things
what to do???
simple
i climbed down 23, 538 arbitrary chimneys
and placed a hamster
by every tree

at least it wasn't as weird
as last christmas

scenes from the mall

it is the little things that become big things...and every thing means something else...for example...just about any body who buys crap they cannot afford...is very likely to cheat on their wife...it is of the same spirit...that is...wanting what you should not have...it may be difficult to believe that driving someone across town when they have nothing to offer you makes you a better lover...but it does:

1-begin to turn around
2-love is action
3-action gives direction
4-the direction of love...is supernatural
5-live in the abundance of gods will

"he who is faithful in little things...is faithful in big things"

baseball...from the book / "d is for wombat...dingo wombat"

when i was 11 years old
i played little league baseball
i remember how i felt
when the coach told me
the game was fixed
and if i hit
one more fucking ball
over the fence
that he would send
some big goon
to my house
to beat the shit
out of my mother

the innocence of youth
flying away like a cat
that has been grabbed by a hawk

in the middle of the galaxy...from the album / "timmy goes into outer-space"...song # 8

in the middle of the galaxy
timmy buys a bottle of rye
sits back on a bar stool
looks out the window at the sky
thinks about his travels
how the universe is simply queer
every planet he traveled to
he was sadly already there

timmy remembers his girlfriend
keeping him locked up in the shed
timmy remembers his father
keeping him locked up in his head
timmy remembers the private school
the fuckers really locked him up there
and if the truth be truly known
timmy was locked up everywhere

timmy has another glass
then another glass as well
hopes to drown a nagging voice
and the fires of hell
timmy finishes the bottle
and walks out through the door
then he walks back in again
and has himself some more
  

life of illusions part 2

was i in love...or attempting to fill some need created during my childhood???

dynamics :

1-we are formed during our childhood
2-needs are created
3-people become metaphors
4-behavior solidifies : fear...enforcement...pride...laziness...self life 
5-our life becomes a circle...repeating the same patterns 

how do we discover our true identity???

1-courage
2-openness
3-humility
4-community
5-patience
6-no agenda
7-experimentation

"inner healing" books...try to shortcut hard work
love is the only healing force there is
"...all things beautiful in his time"

March 20

loomis...from the album / "timmy goes into outer-space"...song # 7

on the planet of loomis
they only have one export
sexual lubrication
they sell it throughout the universe

everyone over 10 year old
is involved in manufacturing
sexual lubrication
they sell it throughout the universe

it is really good stuff
people can't get enough
they don't have to lie to use it
they just take their penis and abuse it
you don't need any rubber
and you sure as hell don't need another
their economy is strong in every nation
the universe loves masturbation

they get cows and goats
and buildings too
for sexual lubrication
they sell it throughout the universe

they get everything they want
and a whole lot more
sexual lubrication
they sell it throughout the universe

the littlest hobo part 2

this time the littlest hobo
is a cat
and instead of helping people
he eats their food
pet goldfish
shits on the carpet
wipes his ass
on the drapes
and fucks off
complaining about them
all the way
to the next town 

fundamentalist christianity...from the album / "the human race"

fundamentalist christianity has all the answers
and they are really simple to understand
like why does evil exist in this world
god did it just because he can

you can only have sex when you are married
even if you don't love your spouse
even if sex is only anger
even if you really want to hang her

remember the garden of eden
what were all those crocodiles doing
hanging around and eating veggies
chopping up carrots then chewing

all of those other religions are of satan
everyone else will burn in hell
even those who really love each other
are sliding down a fire infested well

what is the good of believing something
if you can't violently impose it upon another
or maybe you could withdraw all affection
see how she gets along when nobody loves her

like pharrow

your life is a fucking mess
so now you want to bring
a poodle into it
let me ask you this
einstein
what did that fucking dog
ever do to you
to deserve such a fate

grow the fuck up
and let the poodle go
you know
like pharrow

idiot wind

why are we in relationships ???

1-sex
2-comfort...loneliness
3-approval
4-too lazy to get out
5-financial
6-power
7-society
8-co-dependent
9-love

eight of these are the opposite of giving...that is...a form of lust
what is lust???

1-taking
2-dehumanizing
3-pleasure orientated
4-immediate gratification
5-never satisfied

eight of these will change because...a ) the situation dictates...b) they are not real...c) they are setting you up
but love never fails
we all have tendencies in these other directions
make them bow down to love

timmy misses love...from the album / "timmy goes into outer space"...song # 6

timmy misses love
but he don't know what it is
he wanted to be an actor
timmy loves show biz

timmy misses ice cream
but he don't know how to make it
timmy is a heterosexual
at least learned how to fake it

timmy don't like himself
and he hates himself a bit
timmy is overconfident
timmy is full of shit

timmy likes to travel
through this galaxy and the next
timmy picks his destinations
his nose he also picks

timmy is a little child
hiding undercover
timmy is an old lady too
and timmy is another

these days

i got my friends baby
a book for her
first birthday
war and peace
she didn't read it
i  know this for a fact
because i quizzed her
on chapter seven
and she fucked it all up
anyway
point being
kids have no appreciation for art
these days

what surrounds us feb. 18 2012

we feel our wisdom...love...and integrity will see us through to make the right decisions as we go on in life...we conveniently forget how easy it is to redefine these virtues as we see fit...indeed...let us not forget that our situations confront us for a reason...that if we truly love god...he will manipulate our environment to keep our lower nature from crushing us into little pieces...love is a river...not a person...and anyone who steps out of the river to become his own guide...will lose his soul to the wind of despair

March 12

bible retreat

on our bible retreat
we invited the baptists
from down the road
over for a beer
a skinny dip
and an old fashion game
of naked pool

they declined

life on zeno...from the album / "timmy goes into outer space"...song # 5

life on zeno
everyone is the same
just like checkers on a board
or pieces on a snakes and ladders game
nobody has sex no more
they screwed so much it just become a bore
nobody has an original thought
and if you do
you better not get caught

timmy goes to zeno
but only for a second
if he had opened his fucking mouth
they would have killed him i reckon
greed and lust became their way
sort of like down here today
and after they got everything
turns out
they were left with nothing

people on zeno
can't even have an erection
they make their little baby zombies
with some sort of injection
everything was to make them free
now they are just chained and empty
they are just left with their fearless leader
who threatens with guns
and a meat cleaver

what is life all about...from the album / "timmy goes into outer space"...song # 4

you are dead longer than you are alive
what is life all about
there is only one queen in the bee hive
what is life all about

to save your soul you gotta lose it
if you want to stay sane you better booze it
if you want to get in you better stay out
what is life all about

it all comes down to a quest for love
what is life all about
but show me one fucker who don't push and shove
what is life all about

your dad is a shit and your sister a whore
the way is narrow and there ain't no door
we trust in god and we also doubt
what is life all about

you are taught as a child you better not lie
what is life all about
if you want to get screwed give that one a try
what is life all about

just about everyone is a hypocrite
jesus loves all and he got in shit
70 long fucking years before we get out
what is life all about

drinking and other addictions part 2

i remember back in 1987...i was trying to lead these kids through a particular exercise at a summer camp...the issue was however...they were too occupied throwing rocks in the stream to listen...so i came up with an idea...i would combine the exorcize with the throwing rocks...get a question right...throw a rock...and it worked perfectly...same principal with our addictions...instead of fighting them...love them...curb your addiction to the point that it is actually fulfilling its purpose...(instead of creating an issue)...moderate it...obey it at proper times...you get the score...there is a good chance that once it is tamed...it can actually be extinguished...but if this happens it will happen organically...the real issue is...is your addiction helping you cope with life...and if it is not...make it so .

drinking and other addictions part 1

sometimes miracles happen and people are supernaturally delivered from their vices and proceed to live a normal and well balanced life...usually this is not the case...usually the vice or addiction is there to compensate for some tragic wound that happened a long , long time ago...usually when people are "rehabilitated" from their vices...bitterness , judgement and other such things come into play to compensate...(the dynamic is simple : pour cement over the wound and people will not feel a thing)...there is a better way...t.b.c.

March 7

rock and roll revisited

...new rock blog easily accessed on the right hand side of the page...and if you cannot afford the 10 dollars for my book...see it for free on the LIVE LOVE blog...have a great day...luv stu

shoot that ball mother fucker...from the album / "timmy goes into outer-space"...song # 3

tim goes to axavia x
on the far side of the galaxy
goes to a game of soccer
got a front row ticket for free
those mother fuckers are as hard as rock
three legs each and a four foot cock
a little bit funny and a little bit sick
when someone scores a goal with their dick

chorus :

shoot that ball mother fucker
put it in that net
give yourself a concussion
when you trip over your own dick
let me see you fucking score
your dad is a queer and your mother a whore
shoot that ball mother fucker
what do you think we are paying for

murder ain't illegal there
just a 12 dollar ticket
3 years or more in the county jail
if you don't get that ball and kick it
the game gets better in the second half
someone gets an axe and splits the goalie in half
5 minutes to clean up the mess
just enough time for a smoke i guess

chorus :

sneezie

i have this friend
who sneezes a lot
i call him sneezie
when he sneezes i say
things like
"sneezie
sneeze if you like to sleep
with old dead ladies"
then he does
and i laugh
my hole off

is tim in outer-space...from the album / "timmy goes into outer-space"...song # 2

is tim in outer-space
or out of his fucking mind
does he see the galaxy
or is his head up his behind
is it a quest for freedom
or some paranoid delusion
does he see reality
or is it too much drugs and boozin'

is tim a truth seeker
or is he completely lost
will he find what is real
or in the nut house get tossed
tim's chick is a drug addict
who talks just like an otter
fills the tub with human shit
then adds a little water

he met her at the church breakfast
she said please pass the ketchup
she opened up the bottle
then shook it on her pork chop
next thing timmy knew
he was locked up in her cellar
eating dog food in the dark
he felt like hellen keller

tim has a girlfriend...from the album / "timmy goes into outer-space"...song #1

tim has a girlfriend
she is a fucking co-dependant
tim tries to ditch her
but the bitch won't let him
he gets a restraining order
but she don't fucking get it
so he goes to canadian tire
then builds himself a spaceship

chorus :

fly away timmy
fly past the moon
the bitch is coming for you
just like on high noon
fly past uranus
don't even stop for tea
she is out of her fucking mind
out of her fucking tree

tim stops on pluto
just to get some hash
says please and thank you
hands over a little cash
he is toking  in a field
in his underwear
reaches for a piece of chicken
and the fucking bitch is there

chorus :

March 3

living inside feb. 25 2012

our interpretation of life...our understanding of life and how we should interact with it...more often than not...leaves something to be desired...and here is how we get to this place : 1-we are hurt...2-we define ourselves by this hurt...3-we re-evaluate the world around us...4-we glorify our conclusions...5-we institutionalize our conclusions...
...it takes humility to break this pattern...getting our head out of our ass...looking around us...and having the courage to admit that some...(if not all)...of our conclusions may be wrong : a) circumstances...b) communication and c) commitment to truth are our weapons in this process of re-evaluation...from there...our love must grow and become bigger than our hurt...and...finally...we must continue to be open to change and growth...every day of our lives .   

the minister

the minister told me
that he was on his way
to see a movie concerning
the crucifixion of
jesus christ
he said that it graphically portrayed jesus
being slaughtered on a cross
like you were really there

i told him
to have a lot of fun

100 dollars

...so this fellow i know dedicates his entire summer to help a "friend" add on some piece of crap onto his house...at the end of the summer...he is given 100 dollars for his assistance...(insult)...anyway...in a short while later there is a falling out for some reason or another...and what "card is played" ??? he is in no uncertain terms told that the only reason he helped with the house is for the 100 dollars...and what is my point ??? simple...people can say any fucking thing that comes to their mind and somehow justify it...energy shortage ??? maybe...humility shortage ??? absolutely...and this is just about the greatest problem facing our  strange little blue planet...amen .