...bananas...

THE GAME OF LIFE...banana's not included .

...the crackens...

i hid behind the sun...as i threw up all over my shoes...i heard a young boy yell...RELEASE THE CRACKENS  !!!

what the fuck is a cracken ???

fluck it...

fluck it good...

F U C K

at age six...give or take...i walked into my house and said...'' who is the F U C K around here ??? ''

...apparently...i was .

WHAT HAVE I DONE ???

THE STORM WAS INEVITABLE...BUT NAILING EVERYTHING BACK TOGETHER WITH YOUR TEETH...THINK ABOUT IT SOME MORE .

...being polite...can cost shitloads...

...the world...

Earth is a fuckaly duck duck world .

thing...

the world consists of many things...may your thing not screw you in the ear .

...it happens...

...it happens because the universe thinks it is better that way...

...unfuck...

...sometimes god will extend your life...just to see if you will unfuck things...

orgasm and stuff...

did you notice that an orgasm goes basically through the same shit as a universe while being born ???

...right direction...wrong planet...

shooting aliens...

in russia it is against the law to shoot a yeti...ironically...you can shoot all the little green aliens you fucking well want .

LEVELS...WRITTEN...OCT . 2012

THE LAW IS LIKE A SUIT...WE KEEP ON TRYING ON NEW ONES UNTIL WE FIND SOMETHING THAT FITS .

FLEAS AND BLOOD...WRITTEN...OCT . 2012

AS TRUTH CRAWLS ITS WAY ACROSS THE BEACH TOWARD US...DO WE GET A PEN AND PAPER...OR A BASEBALL BAT ???

church and real...

...go to church and say something real...i dare you !!!

back to the bucket...

you know , if you can convince someone that a bucket of shit is worth a billion dollars...you could be really fucking rich .

...bucket of shit...

...a bucket of shit is worth exactly how much someone is willing to pay for it .

...jesus and hot dogs...

...i remember JESUS well...i sold hot dogs in the audience as he delivered THE SERMON ON THE MOUNT .

broken...

most relationships are not relationships...but alliances...and they are broke as shit .

FANTASTIC PEOPLE...WRITTEN...OCT . 2012

touching another soul...does not mean pounding the fuck out of them .

THE WIND...WRITTEN...OCT . 2012

LOVE IS A TIDE...YET FEAR CAN DRAIN THE OCEAN .

FIRST HAND LEARNING...WRITTEN...OCT. / 2012

LEARNING IS DOING...BEING THERE AND EXPERIENCING...THERE WILL BE PLENTY TIME TO FUCK AROUND  AFTERWARD .

sasquatch dick...

the dick of a sasquatch and the universe...two things that will not stop growing .

...this week in canadian politics...

...there is a name for people who pounce on people who make mistakes...they are called...POUNCERS...and they are a bunch of fucking hypocrites

trudeau...

( trudeau is our greatest leader since...eh ??? trudeau ) .

an ode to trudeau...

...when you do bad things to good people...their balls shrivel up and they refuse to reproduce...
...bee fucking careful...

RIGHT HERE / RIGHT NOW

THIS MOMENT IS YOUR GREATEST TEACHER...EITHER THAT...OR MAKES YOU INTO A TIT...IT ALL DEPENDS...WRITTEN...OCT . / 2012

FUCKIN' UP...WRITTEN...OCT . 2012

NEXT TIME YOU FUCK UP...THINK OF HITLER...THEN GO AND MAKE IT RIGHT ANYWAY.

...going to fuck...

we are always two thirds a penis...and one third an idiot...from everything going to fuck .

love leaves fracks...

love leaves tracks that only a few can see .

FLICK OF THE SWITCH...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

WHAT SEEMS TO HAPPEN IN A SECOND...WAS USUALLY YEARS IN THE MAKING...IT IS JUST THAT THE TURN COMES UPON YOU SO FAST .

BEE TAKEN...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

TWENTY THOUSAND PEOPLE IN A ROOM...ONLY ONE INTERACTION IS AUTHENTIC AND REAL...AND THREE PEOPLE HAVE FIGURED IT OUT...AND THIS IS THE WORLD WE DON'T SEE .

seven inches intergalactic justice...

...sometimes justice is seven inches long .

THE ROAD TO HELL...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

YOUR DIRECTION IS UNIMPORTANT...IT IS THE STATE OF YOUR HEART THAT MATTERS .

ARE YOU THERE ??? WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

MOST PERSONALITIES ARE JUST A RESPONSE TO SOMEONE WHO PISSED THEM OFF. 

bee

bee loyal to someone besides yourself .

nudists...

nudists eat chips that are all dressed .

...rats..and drugs...

life...begin by controlling the rats and drugs...and drugged rats .

life...know that...

life...knows it good...or , at least...has a controlled rat population .

...beliefs...

beliefs must be submissive to love .

abduction...

the weird thing about being abducted by alien ??? they had a wienie  roast right in the middle of the space ship .

...swamp monster...

the swamp monster had this thing for the desert...which , of course...fucked everything up .

truth...and such...

truth...it will sharpen its teeth on your hide .

reality...again...

...REALITY...will return after station identification .

love the old fashion way...

love the old fashion way...sorta...

reality...

any day now...GOD will get busy on his greatest creation...REALITY .

let them eat cake...

...as the grasshopper took another breath...he billowed to the mainly circumcised audience...'' let them eat cake " .

...our planet...

...our planet does not think like you spin...nor does it spin like you think .

...this...

HUMILITY...can beat the shit out of BATMAN .

love is an apple...spelled with silent letters .

true colours...

the non - religious are always just that...until you step on the wrong side of their nut sack ...then we see...

...true colours , baby !!!

...oh , death...

...before i die...i want a cereal named after me...and not one that gives you '' the shits '' , either .

...sea monster discovery...

unfortunately , discovering a sea monster...will resolve more than love .

monkey see...monkey do...

...seeing that the sexually resolved monkeys were more at peace...we set out to kill them all .

EVIL DEAD...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

...when enough lubricant is applied...we all turn into heretics .

life...

...life...it is not about what you think it is...no matter what you think it is .

...love...as it happens...

love...as it happens...so it is .

cocks and crows...

...the truth of the story is...jesus paid the crow to cock three times .

...sex lub .

the best sex lubrication...comes from MARS .

lost and alone...

lost and alone on some forgotten highway...smothered in prostitutes .

THE MADNESS OF INTIMACY...WRITTEN...SEPT. 2012

RELIGION IS THERE TO AVOID INTIMACY...IT COMES DOWN TO THIS...THE ULTIMATE RESPONSE TO THE UNIVERSE IS CONNECTION...IT IS THE ULTIMATE RISK AS WELL .

simple...( an ode to religion ) ...

simple...if you ain't like us..we will kill you .

THE PITFALLS OF COMMUNITY...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

THE NATURE OF LOVE IS COMMUNITY...OTHERWISE...LOVE WILL SWALLOW YOU WHOLE .

follow the sasquatch...

you may not know when you get there...but you will certainly know when you are not .

...nervous break down...

nobody shines while having a nervous breakdown .

spider bananas...

spider bananas...get bit by a radioactive weird o .

EYES THAT SEE IN THE DARK...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

EIGHTEEN MICE FIGHTING OVER ONE CRUMB...THEY MUST HAVE LEARNED IT FROM US .

sasquatch clause...

joy to SASQUATCH CLAUSE...may he eat your head for christmas .

hard - on...

...one penis said to the other...'' stop being so hard on yourself '' .

life is a ribbon...

life is a ribbon around your balls...

...bounce it !!!

...one fucked up cat...

there we were...in a state of meditation...suddenly...this cat began to call from the bushes...'' i am going to kill you '' ... said the little prick...

...that was one fucked up cat !!!

...i got a drink .

...a really good crap...

...even if today was a loss...i still had a really good crap .

NEED TO BE IN LOVE...WRITTEN...SEPT. 2012

THERE IS NO GREATER METHOD OF LEARNING THAN A COMPANION TO SAY..."GROW THE FUCK UP...YOU ARE BEING AN IDIOT " .

MONEY TALKS...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

MONEY TALKS...AND IT USUALLY SAYS NOTHING BUT LIES...POINT...NEXT TIME YOU HAVE SOMEONE SUCKING YOUR PENIS...MAKE SURE THEY DON'T BITE .

circles and life...

...life goes around in circles...each one presenting a new opportunity to grow...and / or shrink .

get off on the right place .

people...fear...

people...they fear and justify...simple , actually .

...screw job...

if the universe is a screw job...then send me a balloon .

...fuck you once...

...if they fuck you once...the other one is not far behind .

...life...

if you cannot love life...at least wave at it as it goes by .

THE COVER-UP...WRITTEN....SEPT . 2012

THE COVER-UP IS USUALLY WORSE THAN THE CRIME .

...all that jazz...

...a lie is there to cover your ass...pants do a far better job .

love...jerk it...

love...jerk it like a flower .

love cakes...

"love cakes''...and for the new generation...''love cakes plus ".

...everything happens...

...everything happens...as it does .

big foot gets a cavity...

...what if big foot gets a cavity ???

penis butter...

penis butter...never crunchy .

KNOWING YOURSELF...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

STEP ONE...while having sex...do you think of people or something else ???

...mind your own business...

the best way not to get caught...is to mind your own fucking business .

...love works...

...love only works under weird conditions .

...swamp freedom...

freedom...my favourite kind is SWAMP FREEDOM .

hole - ology

hole  - ology...don't the kids love it !!!

...bullshit...

the weirdest thing about BULLSHIT...is you can't find it in a discount store .

...the universe...

the universe happened over a spilt second...then it took billions of years to answer its own questions .

...learn...

...learn how it works...and adjust your penis appropriately...

KNOWING YOURSELF...WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

AT LEAST ONE PERSON SHOULD KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU...THERE IS SUPERNATURAL POWER IN RELATIONSHIP .

the survivor...

...the only survivor is dead .

believe me...

believe me when i say...that is unbelievable .

...tender is the fight...

god sure knows how to play rough...and with such tenderness .

ARE YOU EXPERIENCED ??? WRITTEN...SEPT . 2012

LIFE IS AN INTERPRETATION OF WHAT WE THINK AND FEEL...AND IT IS PERPETUALLY GETTING BETTER OR WORSE .

...god bless you...

...god bless you...signed...THE COUNT .

second guess life...

don'r second guess life...or any other whore .

love...rub it...

LOVE...rub it on your corn chips .

Flarmology: love wacks off...

Flarmology: love wacks off...: ...love wacks off to its own rhythm...

love wacks off...

...love wacks off to its own rhythm...

...rhe universe...

...the universe is not what you think it is...but it maybe what you think it is .

...the world....

...the world has lost its sense of humour...and that ain't funny .

hold on...

hold onto your heart...your dick...and your integrity .

don't spook the horse...

eat the grass before it dries up...or something like that .

sex lub...

when you oil the door to your heart...use sex lubrication .

everything is beautiful...

everything is beautiful...and so is everything else .

...get in the way...

...truth...it gets in the way...while it makes a very clear path...

...stoned...

if you visit THE WIZARD OF OZZ...do it stoned .

dying...just embrace it like a squirrel...

dying...sucking life like a tit .

love and your nose...

love takes you by the nose...but in a nice way .

...the beast...

there is a beast...and he plays with his dick , too .

...'' better deal ''...

...the thing about looking for a '' better deal ''...is  that it almost always is a lesser deal .

...maybe your heart...

...maybe your heart should growth teeth .

...dancing rocks...

dancing rocks...they found them on the moon,,,they must mean something .

...life...

LIFE...GET UN - FUCK - ILY - DUCKILY  .

...expections...

what is the good of being born...if there are no unnatural expectations upon you .

shaved fish...

a shaved werewolf...is still a trout...if you are as fucked up as the average .

...ignoring shit...

ignoring shit...can become an art form .

...good ideas...

...a ''good idea'' prances through the valley of life...like a drunken deer .

sucking yourself...

super - hero's happen...when people forget how to suck themselves .

...truth...

truth...now available  in tropical smell brown .

...love never ends...

love...eternity...truth...fried chicken...all will never end .

safely...

i would like to live in a place where you could go to sleep with your door unlocked...and not just because you are stupid .

...what is good...

if it is good...it will produce what is good .

perverts and aliens...

...not all aliens are perverts...and not all perverts are aliens .

life's belief...

life presents the perfect opportunity to develop a firm disbelief in aliens .

...pissed on your fence...

have you pissed on your fence today .

suck my rodan...

...godzilla can suck my rodan...

...a troll...

a troll makes love...like a troll is .

...fuck the cake...

fuck the cake...lets just eat the eggs .

...kindness...

kindness...don't throw it under the bus .

yes...

...yes...but do you mean it ???

make sure...

make sure your reality...is .

...moses...

moses did his best work when he was stoned...think about it .

...time...

time...cook it in fudge .

stars and fucking things up...

...for every star in the sky...there is a way to fuck things up .

control...

'' control...is a taker...and a whore .

control is...

control is nurturing gone fucked up .

...the turtle...

the turtle...our planets untapped potential .

...turtles...

it doesn't matter if turtles run the planet...what matters is that they are friendly .

...love needs...

love needs more glue...if not for healing...for sniffing .

...the trout of love...

we fish for the trout of love...down the river if lust...on the far side of the lake of insanity .

...just because...

...just because it is seen that way...does not mean it is .

...as...

...as it happens...it may or may not be .

...love walks...

...love walks on many legs...some of which have feet attached .

great love songs...

drop dead means i love you...so b baby won't you drop dead and die .

mr . obvious...

your personhood can be revealed...with the turn of a head...with an itch of the ear..it all depends upon who is looking .

...the leg of love...

...sometimes the leg of love...gets stuck up the ass of insanity .

favourite hockey player...jack - off ...

masturbation...a key for a better tomorrow .

an ode to an apple...

...as the apple pie made its way into the over...the importance of apples...kicked the baker right square in the nuts .

squirrels and such...

a squirrel by any other name...is still a prick .

...balls...

balls...the reason why crabs don't go any faster .

...eat shit...

i am here to kick ass and eat shit...and the shit is already gone .

there is a god...

of course there is a god...the question is...what will he do to you ???

price tags...

...price tags can fuck you up .

...the gooder you get...

...the gooder you get...the bestes you become .

sexual preference...

maybe there is a different sexual preference...for every person .

...fuck - a - sauras...

fuck - a - sauras,,,rex,,,dinosaur sex maniac .

...way to eternity...

...a funny thing happened to me on my way to eternity today...

...perversion...

for most...the size of their perversion is the size of their teeth .

...every moment...

...every moment deserves a drink .

fucking - up...

fucking - up...because old is better .

...the more we love...

the more we love...the more we expand .

...one summer...

...it happened one summer...on a winter's night .

beautiful...

beauty feels no need to hide .

...fuck pie...

FUCK PIE !!!

...organic community...FOR FREE...read my book...

doesn't it concern you that while reading  through hundreds of years of history....there is not one example of organic community development .

...the water...

if you do not like the wind...live under the water .

...fear of self...

we learn fear...especially...fear of self .

...maybe...maybe not...

maybe there is a universe for every weird thought .

time...

...don't buy it from an idiot .

...pissing people off...

pissing people off...the best way to leave planet earth .

...do whatever...

...do whatever the fuck you want...see what happens .

naked...

...naked...even rats do it .

...free milk shake...

...death...includes free milkshake...( straw , extra ) .

skinny...

the prize for winning the hot dog eating contest...was eternal skinniness .

thing about you dying...

...the thing about you dying...is that we can't  rely on it .

...'' shit hits the fan '' ...

...when the '' shit hits the fan ''...don't be too concerned what kind of fan it is .

u . f . o .

i thought i saw an alien invasion once...but it turned out to be just a bear .

the fuck-ster ...

the fuckster bringd fuck-a-mania...and the world becomes a far better place .

...big fucking hole...

life is a box of cereal...with a big fucking hole in the middle .

peanut butter and lust...

maybe our reality crashed into another reality...and all we need now is some peanut butter .

...it...

sometimes it happens...so the other thing does not .

once you discover that the world in insane...what next ???

life offers...

life offers something to suck on for every piece of the pie .

...sex per day...

...before you start masturbating five rimes a day...remember...you will never get the sex per day record if you do .

...god's chuckles...

...ever wonder how god gets his biggest chuckles ??

...the river of life...

the river of life...now in new peppermint .

..."the universe...one size fits all " .

love is...

...somedays...love is a cracker...stuck to a parrots ass .

maybe...maybe not...

maybe the universe is just a possum swinging from a tree...maybe not .

who cares ???

...caring...god doesn't think it is funny .

...peanut butter...

...life...don't forget the peanut butter .

...sperm and aliens...

...maybe the aliens want out sperm , or  something...you know...to slide down hill on when they don't have any snow .

head up ass....

having your head up your ass...does not make you an olympic athlete .

lick its tits...

life...lick its tits and see what happens .

color my world...

...the moment i saw your nipple...i realised what my favourite color was .

love is a thing....

maybe love is a thing...found inside another thing .

...get the picture...

it is one thing for you to say you will call me up...then not...it is another thing for you to say you call me up...then not...then give me shit about it .

...chicken...

usually...DO YOU WANT THE LAST PIECE OF CHICKEN...carries more weight than...I LOVE YOU .

self deception...

if self deception is our enemy...then why do we feed off it like a hungry animal ???

...in life....

...in life...always bet on the idiot .

eternity...do not...

eternity...do not piss it off .

the dinosaur...

...if you ever see a dinosaur...do not be so preoccupied with its non - existence...that you forget to run .

...the poor...

more often than not...the poor are richer than the rich .

...the point...

if you watch horror movies for intellectual meaning...you missed the point .

...the burden of a giant fiddle crab...

'' take care of your own giant fiddle crab'' ...says the lord .

love fiddles...

...love fiddles with space and time .

dick waving contest...

just because it is a ''dick waving contest''...does not mean you have to stick it through someone's eye .

say...life...

it is not that life does not happen at the end of your penis...it is just that it happens other places as well .

...thinking...better done...

...thinking...better done without shit in your mouth .

...giant squid...

if i were a giant squid...i would finger myself all day long .

...one word...

...one word from god...and we are ass fucked .

...the eel...

...man looks at the EEL...and sees himself .

...people are not...

what people are not...the way they see themselves .

...the sea monster...

a sea monster should live in a sea...if for no other reason...to sustain his sexuality .

...this fucking mess...

how do we get out of this mess ??? simple...keep sucking .

...new world...

it is bad manners to ask god for a new world...while you are still fucking up the old one .

...love will spill over both sides .

frog and ass...

...if a frog jumps up its own ass...it may look cool...but that is about it .

trust...

TRUST...start will road kill...then build up .

may the FART OF LIFE...blow you to beautiful , distant shore lines .

1986 / beautiful birds

the loons praise jesus...oh , how they wiggle .

...lost in space .

they will all march together...lost and delirious .

...invisible man....

...if we could only see how life fucked up THE INVISIBLE MAN...we would turn and run away .

...god...

GOD...on both sides of the stick .

...the oral sex...

THE ORAL SEX...is not a hockey team .

...be thankful...

...be thankful for your shit...

...maybe reality is just something to scratch your ass with .

the world is a chicken...

...the world is a chicken...who has been pulverised by another chicken .

waste of money...

...an unnecessary expense that makes you feel good...buying a POCKET PUSSY...that isn't big enough for your dick .

...the blender of love...

suck your life through THE BLENDER OF LOVE .

love is...

...love is a can opener from god .

...hot dog stand...

...the universe probably makes a good hot dog stand .

...most embarrassing moment...

my most embarrassing moment ??? when i thought that the teacher told me to piss on the back of the head of the girl in front of me .

...sept . 1979...

...the universe lies naked in a canoe , drinking labrador tea .

...reality...a strange diet...

reality's favourite food is testicles .

...little bit of sex...

...there is a little bit of sex...in just about everything we so .

...justice...

justice...give it a hand...lob .

...penis wheels...

penis wheels...roll on through the night .

...every day...

...every day you live...is one less day you can be eaten by a whale .

the people machine...

who pisses in the people machine ???

...fight to love...

the fight to begin to love...starts with a broken hand and a swollen groin .

...the werewolf...

does a werewolf ever have enough spare time to confront his sexuality ???

...one winter's night...

...it came one winter's night...and shat everywhere .

...the end of the universe...

the end of the universe...is like the end of a nipple...but different .

shit sandwich...

secrets...make your own shit sandwich with them as high as it can go .

sexual orientations...

sexual orientations are like pre - historic fish...there are always new ones being discovered .

...on the way...

... all happened on the way to nothing happening .

...shit...

...shit goes one way on our train .

...1987 ... june / august

the red falcon...flies into his own penis .

...space crackers...

space crackers...the less available...the more expensive...sort of like love .

people are like owls...

people are like owls...especially if the owls manipulate and bullshit a lot .

religion...does it work ???

...if your religion does not work...get a new one .

...the egge of the universe...

THE EDGE OF THE UNIVERSE...GIVES SOME PEOPLE A HARD - ON .

...your ass...

just because love will sometimes journey through your ass...never consider it to be dirty .

...the tide of life...

...the TIDE OF LIFE...how many ducks can float upon it ???

...jelly fish...

...i feel like a jelly fish hard - on .

in '' sucking it ''...never forget the '' it '' .

...fill it with love...

instead of throwing a universe away...fill it with love .

...jesus...

...if jesus can save the world...he can only do it one way...SLOWLY and with no cheating .

...digging up shit...

truth...start digging and do not stop until you hear the giggles .

destiny...A . C .

...your destination will not change...but the cuts and the valleys you have to travel can can easily be switched around .

...mr . zilla...god zilla

it is a commonly known fact that , in a fist fight...GODZILLA...would fuck up RODAN ...( you know...if they existed ) .

...life...

life...thank's for 58 % of it .

...spirit...

...there is the spirit...there is religion...never confuse the two .

give a screw , buckaroo...

before you give a fuck...you first need a bucket .

love...let it...

love...let it boil your shit away .

hope is...

hope is not random .

...theology...

...is your theology...FUNNY ???

fuck - all - lee...

'' the fuck - all - lee- duck -all -lee express '' ...will get you where you do not want to go .

...hash...

the universe weeps...better with hash .

kick in the nuts...

there are many ways to be kicked in the nuts...non are met with pleasure .

...sexual exploration...

sexual exploration ranges anywhere from a bird in hand...to a giant penis , 20 , 000 miles long and destined to blow up the world .

...love crackers...

LOVE CRACKERS...they will still crumble in your bed .

...intimacy in monkey land...

community orientated...social / sexual monkeys...LIVE LONGER .

into temptation...

if you are not allowed to be tempted...you will never see tempted .

...naked...

...the way to your soul...is naked...

...the shit slide...

if you don't want your kid to shit all over the place...do not put him on the shit slide .

...dying...

...dying makes life...so much easier .

...love will...

...love will never fail...but in failing...we can love .

before you die...

...before you die...make sure the world knows how stupid you are .

...the absence of love...

...the absence of love...will create all sorts of dark shit .

...accountable...

...people are only accountable...after they discover that they are loved .

the spanking truth...

if something seems completely true...that probably means it is not 100 % false .

Flarmology: ...reality unfolds...

Flarmology: ...reality unfolds...: ...reality always has a desire to unfold .

...reality unfolds...

...reality always has a desire to unfold .

life and dick...

life...shove it like a penis .

...the space between...

...the difference between optimal support and taking your fucking foot off...is not as great as it may seem .

...the nipple...

lust was a defeated foe...until the nipple was slapped in his face .

...love is...

...love may reveal all things...but it is not a tattle tail either .

...exploring...

try not to explore...using dynamite .

...love...

...LOVE...in exciting new strawberry flavour .

life...ejaculate it...

life...ejaculate the shit out of it...

...time...

...something some people are worth...and others are not .

...better tomorrow...

maybe GOD'S idea of a '' better tomorrow ''...is simply you...shutting the fuck up .

fuck off

FUCK OFF...the worlds shortest poem .

...is not love...

peanut butter is not love...it just spreads like it .

...another soul...

a view into another soul will happen when it supposed to .

...vivid...

...as time draws to an end...the colours of life will become more and more vivid .

intergalactic travel standards

...the aliens that anal probe...would never qualify for their u . f. o . license .

dies or something...

she will be back...you know...after  she dies or something .

...intelligent life...

...they say that for every 1 , 000 planets with intelligent life...there is one just like earth .

...the raven said...

...'' fuck '' , said THE RAVEN...as he gazed upon the shinny thing .

...penguin blues...

one fucking square testicle...and all the other penguins will piss all over you .

...hot , steaming shit...

as it turns out...i am not the HOT SHIT that i thought i was...thing is...if i had been...the quality of my work would have diminished by as much as  90 % .

yo - yo...

...maybe this galaxy is GOD ' S favourite yo - yo .

hop , my little lizard friend...hop...

you are not a toad...you are something much better .

...the BIG universe...

...the universe is not big nor small...it is something we have not considered .

...if the universe...

...if the universe is just a fart...then the answer is blowing in the wind .

freedom and such...

if you want freedom...learn how to swing an axe .

...to see clearly...

...to see clearly...you must love what you are looking at .

life...

life...spread it like turtle shit .

die - ology ...

...i would rather die ten years too early than ten years too late .

life...

...learn the important things and the easy things...

eyes of life...

life...do not look into its eyes .

life...don't...

life...do not take it too seriously .

...it never happened...

it never happened...now shut up and go away .

gone in 30 seconds...

if you can take any conversation in the  world...and in 30 seconds make it about yourself...this is not a spiritual gift .

the carp of reality...

reality...is it a tarp or a carp .

peace and harmony...

peace and harmony happens best on a distant , uninhibited ,  planet .

life...

...life...nail it to your brain .

sex and sex...

the most sexual part about the sex...is the sex .

life...more than just...

life...more than just a crack in your ass .

life...

...life...scrape the shit off of it .

...rub your balls...

...life...rub your balls before it is too late .

LIFE...

life...try it with special sauce .

...the game of justice...

justice is a game that requires two testicles to play .

fuck you power...

a brain tumour is a toothache with extra FUCK - YOU power .

moving mountains...

before you move a mountain...make sure you don't move it on your face .

...the journey...

...the journey starts with one flush of the toilet .

wisdom is love...

wisdom is love...cracked open .

scissors and balls...

how do we make the world a better place ??? simple...scissors and balls .

...life is a thing...

life is a thing often molested by other , more confused things .

life...how much ???

life...how much can we get out of this fucking thing , anyway ???

self portrait...

may your self portrait include lips .

manipulation blues...

...as we grow...we find different ways to manipulate the shit out of everything .

ducks...

...ducks...they are not just for screwing anymore .

...doing your best...

most people really are trying ''their best''...which means , of course...we really got to change the definition of those particular words .

stroking...

whatever you stroke says more about you than what you are stroking .

...in the context of love...

in the context of love...just about all is reasonable .

true lovers...

abuse changes everything...and only the true LOVERS can take that abuse and direct it in a healthy path .

do not hold your bird...

...in asking a favour from GOD...make sure you smile and do not hold your bird .

...fuck and stuff...

...FUCK...is a word that knows its way around the bathroom .

...lost in...

a forest and sex...both there to get lost in .

figure this one out...

RANGER SMITH...THIS IS AN ORDER...

...gutz...

...you don't know what personal pain someone is in...until you squish their fucking head and see the guts ooze all over the place .

healthy interaction...

...healthy interaction...we will fuck that up too .

...the count...

i always wanted to punch out COUNT DRACULA...right in the fucking teeth .

next time...

...next time you run away...run into your self .

...more love...

...the more love...the more temptation .

truth and reward...

truth is its own reward...especially in you consider someone pissing all over you a reward .

...the crackin...

when the tide subsides...we will see the crackin frolic about as he fondles his naughty bits .

suck the tit...

the teacher said we were allowed to play...SUCK THE TIT...as long as we didn't enjoy ourselves .

two things remain...

two things will always remain...LOVE and BEING STUPID .

fucking up...

self - righteousness is our cure for fucking up .

blowing up the planet...

all it takes is sylphis .

...life happens...

...life happens when you most expect it...or least expect it...hard to say , really .

the universe...

...the universe all comes down to...'' GEE , YA THINK " .

love is...

love is what you encounter...as you walk your dog .

truthiness...( again )...

truth is a dick...that seldom gets sucked .

...the truth...

'' you shall know the truth ''...then have another glass of rum .

...the wheel of life...

a wheel is the penis of a plan to make a better tomorrow .

suckology...

SUCK HARD .

...throw away...

throw away everything...see what is left...cherish it .

...box o choco...

life is like a box of chocolates...or shit...depends .

...the universe ejaculates...

the universe ejaculates into a far deeper hole .

loneliness...

i am not fucking lonely...you are the one with 23 kids...you are the lonely one .

man's first...

man's first invention was a rock over some poor fuckers head .

...the good lord...

once the horn beast starts sucking...THE GOOD LORD ALONE...only knows what is next .

...the universe...

the universe is a hamburger...and i am not quite sure what that makes us .

fuck the duck...

a duck , a duck...a religion for every duck !!!

sexual holiness...

most people's SEXUAL HOLINESS...is a product of fear , deception . lying and manipulation .

truth hits you...

truth HITS YOU...because it has nothing better to do .

...a breast...

a breast , a breast...a breast for a piece of cake...( or something like that ) .

lie your way through life...

lie your way through life...and get a free reversal blowjob .

how many a penis ???

...how many a penis has been held capture ???

...criminal...

...it is not a crime to be careful about what you say .

an ode to sexual preferences...

my sexual preference...keeping away from idiots .

HOW ???

before you pronounce something EVIL...how is it hurting someone .

...poor behaviour...

with every poor behaviour...there is a poor bullshit excuse attached .

naked canoeing...

slide through your own personal truth .

upgrade...

people spend half of their lives downgrading themselves...and the other half...pretending it is an upgrade .

...does god ???

DOES GOD CLUTTER ???

...the milky way...

the universe behaves exactly like a penis...right up to and including the MILKY WAY .

...darwin...

...i wonder if DARWIN screwed monkeys ???

f . off ...

...tell it to fuck off .

...fucking up the world...

...all it takes is some elbow grease...and a good case of syphilis .

...land of eternal bliss...

make sure your LAND OF ETERNAL BLISS...is not full pf trolls .

something stupid...

the bigger the crowd...the easier it is to get them to believe something stupid .

something else...

the doctor said...'' son , you either got a brain tumour or something else ''...i said...''how about a new car instead '' ...he just laughed and passed me his joint , and wiggled his scrotum .

what is truth ???

...truth is a pudding that often gets thrown in your face .

think...

if you think that GOD cannot get shit done without you...then you are not thinking very much at all .

the loch ness monster...

if you ever see the loch ness  monster...then forget about it being impolite to stare .

...don't be stupid...

...if you have not bought your 12 year old a POCKET PUSSY...you are stupid .

...the world is your oyster....

...the world is your oyster...or something like that .

love puts you...

...love puts you in a pickle...but the pickle is armed to the teeth.

...love is a door...

love is a door...that is sometimes broken over your head .

the new math...

taking it all...leaves you with nothing .

...a flat tit...

a flat tit fits well with a rounded breast .

...the work...

you don't know the first thing about this shit , do you ???

bag - o - shit .

if you buy a bag of shit...make sure the bag is good quality .

...plan love...

if you plan love...plan it to be as hard as a turtle's dick .

eternal reality...

love takes time to build a reality that will never fade away .

hole in your ass...

...you can tell the universe passed through you...because it leaves a fairly large hole in your ass .

...fucking up...

it is not about FUCKING UP...it is how you go about unfucking FUCKING UP that matters .

flush your sperm...

if your sperm cannot do the back stroke...flush ' em .

being impressed...

...most spend their entire lives trying to impress someone who will never be impressed .

the dr . said

the dr  . said...'' don't worry , son...everyone in this world is busy fighting brain cancer ''...''either that or something else '' .

...great ideas...

a lot of people have great ideas...until they realise that they may cost something .

...the universe...

...as the universe turns...suddenly...good ideas become bad ideas .

...fucking bad...

just because someone does not know their place in the universe...does not mean that they are a FUCKING bad human being .

...the spider to the fly...

...i can just imagine how fucked up your mother is...SAID THE SPIDER TO THE FLY .

spend time...

spend time...figuring shit out .

crabs on the beach...

crabs on the beach...how they desire to lick each other .

...love will...

love will show up when you least expect it...like on a ferry's wings...or something stupid like that .

...the funniest things...

...the funniest things in life...nobody laughs .

...meet the fuckers...

...as much as people claim to be innocent...the fuckers are usually guilty .

...life is...

...life is as complicated as those involved .

the universe...

the universe is a square place...or so it will turn out .

yeti and sasquatch...

...the difference between the yeti and the sasquatch ??? alcohol consumption .

sam the sperm...

SAM THE  SPERM...always wondered what he did to deserve such a catchy name .

deal with it...

...what people fail to get is...if you place people in an environment where they cannot deal with things...then they will not deal with things .

...sex...

it is not about the act...but about the spirit behind the act .

...sex...

SEX WILL SCREW YOU .

being wise...

being wise...being stupid...only love keeps all in balance .

truth and shit...

...if truth is found in a pile of shit...is it any less valid ???

...here comes the religion...

...when love is gone...here comes the religion .

quality...

quality of bullshit...is irrelevant ...

shit quality...

did you know that HITLER possessed just about every quality he considered to be a '' shit quality '' ???

...clear blue sky...

they will find your weakness...and fuck you across the clear blue sky for it .

...love turd...

...there is no such thing as a LOVE TURD .

LOVE ME...LOVE ME...said the spider to the pie .

a naked universe is off to a good start .

checkers...

i can tell by the way you play checkers...you fuck around on your wife .

...your religion...

it is one thing to have a religion...it is quite another to think your religion has a point .

fuckalee...

every shit piece of behaviour...is in place to make someone function...or fuckalee function .

screwball...

...life is a screwball factory...and the screws are up your ass .

...your love...

your love is not an egg...do not fire it at the village idiot .

wiping your ass...

maybe if we wiped our ass counter clock-wise...things would go better .

...your shit...

your shit should teach you humility...not how to throw shit .

shit will never qualify for...

SHIT WILL NEVER QUALIFY FOR...the big race...

truth dances...

truth dances with broken ankles .

masturbation...

perpetual masturbation...on the average...add 4 years to your life .

...the truth...

hide behind the truth...nobody will ever believe that it is you .

life is a frog...

life is a frog...jumping to the wrong planet .

...the fall of all...

the best thing about '' the fall of the universe ''...more time to play with your nuts .

shit in the fan  ??? first...show me the fan .

...cover me..july 2017

the universe...it is not my fault .

life is...

life is a toilet that sometimes backs up on itself .

right and wrong...

...as per usual...you are both right and wrong...and pre-ejaculated .

don't forget to remember...

let everything remind you of everything else .

containment...

reality and love...cannot be contained .

...where we belong...

those places where we belong...we do not need to desperately attempt to penetrate .

...fuck off...

...the universe knows how to say...FUCK OFF...better than just about anyone else .

...be the champion...

be the champion of pissing all over human stupidity .

...love will...

...love will choke you up...

...don't tell god...

DON'T TELL GOD .

...don't...

DON ' T TELL GOD .

l . o . v .e ...

love will blow this thing around...any fucking place it wants to .

...the turd of life...

...the turd of life...clean it off today .

...an ode to chicken...

chicken is better...if it is chicken .

...bend it...

bend it...lick it...stick it...until the frog embraces being green .

love evolves...

...if love evolves...it will be into something better...

...justify...

...take it in...justify it...then shit it out...simple .

caribou...

...so , i have had this sweater for over 20 years now...and still nobody has noticed the caribou on the back with the three foot penis .

...fuck , em...

FUCK ' EM...HEY , MUDDER...said the girl at the N E W F I E wedding .

life...

life happens as it does...and leaves as it was .

air sixkness...

when a plane gets sick...it takes a rest...in the side of a mountain .

...bend...

...bend it all you want...the universe is still as flat as godzilla's penis .

...the screw of life...

THE SCREW OF LIFE...where does it end ???

...love holes...

LOVE HOLES...they will get you when you least expect it .

...love fucks up...

...love fucks up everything we thought we knew about  nothing .

MY DOCTOR...

my doctor told me i had CROSBY , STILLS and NASH disease...weird , eh ???

...life will...

...life will squirt itself into your face .

eternal...

the road that leads to eternal beauty and truth...almost always looks like shit .

...suckies...

...she named our oral sex toy...SUCKIES...but i am not sure why .

love leftovers...

love leftovers...power love with humility...universal dignity...and other really cool shit .

Flarmology: secrets you hide...

Flarmology: secrets you hide...: the secrets you hide...anywhere near them...and you squeal like a pig .

secrets you hide...

the secrets you hide...anywhere near them...and you squeal like a pig .

before you fly...

before you fly...tape wings to your penis...and your ego .

self-gratifying...

you are either into self-gratifying...or self-gratification .

smile...

i am suggesting that the FRENCH are good cooks...i was not suggesting that you were not...luv stu

nothing is...

...nothing is hardly ever what is seems...you know...take for example...everything .

first year student...r . b. c .

this german guy gave me a 10 minute lecture of all the shit he didn't like about me...thing is...i didn't understand a fucking word he said .

...looking good...

people do not mind looking bad...as long as it makes them look good .

fuck you over...

if someone will fuck you over once...they will do it twice...especially if they promise they won't .

reveal...

the world painfully attempts to reveal god's love...or not...

a trip is a trip...

next power trip...try not to trip on your ass .

an ode to a cup of coffee...

sometimes giving someone a coffee...is them giving you a coffee...but what is it when you spill some on their lap ???

...what next ???

...when you discover that everyone is a bit of a deviant...what next ???

low blows...

love may be forever...however , forever is very capable of '' low blows '' .

...walking on...

walk out of an institution...( church , for example) ... walk back any time...walk out of love...good luck finding your way home .